If I were to investigate in why it hasn’t been a great day other than the lack of caffeine until now, one thing to take into consideration is that I am a prospective exchange student, leaving to a university in Germany from old Vancouver in just a bit more than three weeks. Mixed feelings are all over the place.
I’ve been in school since forever, and I have never stopped. Every September might have been dreadful, but it was always routine. However painful, the dreadfulness eventually vanished and then we, as students, realized that months were just passing by, and there went another school year. This September though, I continued on my summer by sleeping in till ten in the morning while all my friends return to school, because fall semester starts in late October in Germany. I am in a place where I have time, but I don’t really have time—with no job, no school, I am turning my activeness into waiting, waiting for October to come, when I travel to the country where I will be spending my third year university in. It certainly feels strange, this limbo, pending period. I discovered that I am not even able to acquire a pass for local transit from my home university because I am no longer “registered.”
Sitting here, watching high school girls and boys in their backpacks walking and chatting, September seems not so bad after all. They look awfully young and fresh, I think I can sense jealousy oozing out of my eyes. Seeing younger people only makes you reflect upon your own age, that was when I remembered that I’m already third year into undergrad.
Where has the time gone?
This summer in particular, felt extremely unproductive, and hazy in remembrance. There is this question that friends ask each other when they meet up: “What have you been up to these days.” Nowadays, this question appeals to me to be more dreadful than when-September-come. In this limbo period, when I am pending for my life to begin again in Germany once October comes, I witness many friends not only returning to school, but exceeding their normal activities as to participating in multiple jobs and volunteer works. I believe that is where the difference between university and high school students lies: when adults go back to school, time is a precious matter and we know that to our dear hearts. It is no longer just about picking out a new backpack, new stationary, and a new locker, but about how to utilize this time as a new beginning; to change old habits into improvements, to extend our network by reaching out and meeting more people, knowing the fact that there is always someone out there, even just within one university or college, who is more successful than ourselves, and from whom we can learn a ton from. Adult students see that time is ticking; there is not always another test to make up our marks or another meeting with the counsellor to figure out what we want to do in life. It is indeed interesting to be a bi-stander for once; be the one who is not returning to school just yet, and therefore able to witness my friends’ changes as September approaches. I only have three more weeks to do so, then it is time for me to hustle, for another year, but one that is much more challenging, different, and eye-opening.
Recently as my friend and I were discussing and agreeing with each other about how time seemed to be passing by much more quickly this summer and yet it felt so helplessly unproductive, she suggested something very interesting: since technology is so advanced now, we all have our own cell phones, computers, and therefore different time indications, which obviously do not show exact congruence with every other electronic device in the time zone. Because of that, time is possibly passing by faster, literally.
I am sorry to disappoint you but I have no answer to if that is actually happening or not, however, what an intriguing thought it is.
I hope time slows down a little so we can catch up to it.
I have no words to describe the change in my perspective of time’s preciousness in this past summer, I certainly hope however, that I will not forget how this change feels—then I can at least remember and be proud of how I spend this valuable little thing called time, even when it is going at a seemingly faster speed than ever.
